texas

texas, i love you

you will always be my home

my first breath inhaled your thick air

my first cries echoed in your flat lands

your cracked soil built my spine

i am made of you, texas

you raised me as the bluebonnets in spring

and washed me anew

by the warm summer rains

i think of you a lot, texas

how i grew bored of you

resented you

wished i could be anywhere

but with you

i thought you were too proud

but i see now that i was the proud one

who thought myself too good for you

i didn’t see your beauty, texas

i know that now

see texas, i was distracted

by the suffocation you brought me

i couldn’t breath deep enough

to take you all in

but it’s not your fault i wasn’t willing

to stretch and grow to your vastness

i miss you, texas

i wish to see your stars again

to run in your spaces

and float down your rivers

i’m sorry, texas

that i washed your dirt from my hands

and spat your words out of my mouth

they say distance makes the heart grow fonder

twelve years and states between us

and i look over my shoulder

and smile at you, texas

honored that it is you behind me

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